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I'd Like to Teach This Choir to Sing

I'd like to teach this choir to sing in perfect harmony

But how the hell I do that is a mystery to me

The tenors always seem confused, the altos lose their place

With dizzy young sopranos and a geriatic bass.

They like to chat amongst themselves and pass the time of day

I don't believe they listen to a single word I say.

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Shall we warm up now?

All stand up, move away

All hula hoop then let it droop

Sing ah, ay ee, oo, ay

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I'd like to teach this choir to sing, a monumental task

For goodness sake, just concentrate, is that too much to ask?

I'd like to see this choir for once, without their scores in hand

And smiling at the audience, now wouldn't that be grand?

They didn't like the Java Jive, the coffee or the tea

They much prefer Prosecco that is obvious to me

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I'll make this choir keep practising, over and over etc etc

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